Karaoke night at Sun Lakes

Friday 9.26.14

 
I had to do an additional post this week, and out of sequence, but I just couldn’t wait to share my experience with you on Karaoke night at Sun Lakes

I will start off with the definition of Karaoke for historical purposes: Use of a device that plays instrumental accompaniments to songs with the vocal tracks removed, permitting the user to sing the lead. Karaoke apparently first appeared in the amusement quarter of Kobe, Japan, where it became popular among businessmen in the late 1970’s. It gained widespread popularity in the U.S. in the late 1980’s. It is usually featured at bars, where patrons can perform on a stage and sing popular hits by reading lyrics electronically displayed on a monitor. A video film often accompanies the music.

 So BFF Hubby and I, as a part of our quest to participate in the variety of activities at Sun Lakes, had committed to going to the once a month Karaoke night with BFF Hubby’s Mom.   We found to our surprise that they allowed outsiders, hey now, that is a big deal!  Sun Lakes is snobby about that.  We met some people from Banning, a lot of people from the Plantations and those that were simply guests of Sun Lakers.

The best I could ascertain from this experience was: “Apparently Karaoke divides people into two    groups - those who don’t want to sing and shouldn’t be compelled to, and those who do and shouldn’t be allowed too!” <Grin>  (Full disclosure, it was my first Karaoke experience in a public venue.  My only other experiences with Karaoke were with close friends and family at my daughter’s home and it involved a lot of drinking.)

For these oldsters, there is no halfway singing; they sang like they thought they were a star, country singer, crooner, or an opera diva.  At least that is how I heard it, and they would act out if they were singing something like a Neil Diamond song, doing Elvis Presley like moves.  It was very funny and entertaining to see a 90 year old shaking it while singing horribly off key. The people that intrigued me the most brought their own music for the DJ. These apparently are the karaoke stars, and compared to the others that sang, well let’s just say they could carry somewhat of a tune, or at least I think they did, it was hard for me to judge as I had never heard of the songs they were singing. <Grin>

These people sang songs from the 40’s, before this oldie moldie was even born.  The host, a friend of BFF's Mom, had asked BFF Hubby and I if we knew the songs, to which we replied with a resounding NO, never heard it before.  Apparently this got her ire up, as she said, “Oh come on now; you have to know these!  I’m 76 and I sang this as a kid with my Mom.”  To which I said, “Umm, you have me by 10 years,” and that shut her up. <Grin>

This made me realize as a kid I had a pretty hip Mom; she sang Elvis, Dean Martin, Sinatra, and Beatles, actually whatever tunes were popular and on the hit parade.  Now don’t get me wrong, she probably knew some of these songs, but wasn’t stuck in an era.  She did sing some 40/50’s songs, as I recall.  One of my favorites was a Doris Day song about a silly old ram that thought he could punch a hole in a dam, but he had had high hopes, apple pie in the sky hopes. <Grin>

Let me tell you these oldies sang some very strange country songs, like before Garth Brookes; who knew country existed on the radio before Garth. <Grin>  I thought to myself, maybe I had heard these songs as a kid and I just didn’t understand the lyrics!  I mean, have you ever heard somebody sing some lyrics that you've never sung before, and you realize you've never sung the right words in that song?  You hear them and all of a sudden you say to yourself, “Life in the Fast Lane?”  That's what they're saying right there?  You think, why have I been singing “Wipe the Vaseline.” <Grin>

As the night dragged on, seriously, I thought my clock had broken.  But I must say I enjoyed watching two couples sitting at the table next to me, one of the men was 92 and his wife was 89.  They sang some songs, which they told me were from WWII; here is where I say that BFF Hubby’s Mom was also grooving to them.

Well finally, they were playing a couple of songs we knew from the 60’s.   Whoot, Whoot!  So hubby and I sang along with them, and we thought this might be fun after all.  We sang in tune, and were harmonizing; singing it the way it was meant to be, trying to help the singer with the microphone hit the right notes.  I mean if Karaoke were a sport in Sun Lakes we’d be gold medalists. <Grin>

Oh, oh, one of the more serious singers came up, and before he sang, he said feel free to sing with me on the chorus, but not the main song.  OHHHH, guess he was sending us a message, don’t mess with my 5 minutes of fame!  Apparently there is Karaoke etiquette, who knew!  I guess you are only supposed to sing along if the person singing invites you to.  <Grin>

Funny of the night for me was this woman sang a song, which we had never heard of, and the DJ says, “Lets hear it for tonight’s star, how many want to see it posted on YouTube?”  Well, first of all I was amazed they had heard of You tube, but then I was thinking aha, next time I will video tape it, and do exactly that; it would get a zillion hits as it is hysterical. But hey, these oldsters really know how to have fun!

This experience made me more determined to find the under 70’s people, they must be out there somewhere!  After all I keep hearing the statistics as to how many baby boomers there are retiring. If and when I find them, we will take Karaoke night over and make it a rocking 60’s night at Karaoke, I shall call it the Karaoke wars. <Grin>

Stay with me and I thank you again for taking this retirement journey with me, or "my longest coffee break."  I'm just sayin’……..

If you can Dream it you can do it!!

Keep your thoughts positive because your thoughts become your words. Keep your words positive because your words become your behavior. Keep your behavior positive because your behavior becomes your habits. Keep your habits positive because your habits become your values. Keep your values positive because your values become your destiny.  Mahatma Gandhi

I tried keeping that in mind as we continued our walk through the house, I kept telling myself you have been through this before, see the positive possibilities.  Redirect your panic and the energy of your frustration into positivity and that Raelene unstoppable determination! I really tried, but all that kept creeping into my head was, just remember the contractor's initial estimate should be seen as a work of fiction…. so make sure you get three estimates on everything. <Grin>.

We started making lists of what needed to be done, but then as we listed each thing, we began to realize if we stopped there it would only make everything else look worse. Hmmm, ‘‘If only we could get a new couch,'' I say, but once I made that glorious purchase, my eye was drawn to the carpet, which looked fine when we bought the house, but now empty, with a brand-new couch sitting on it, appears to suffer from a medical condition.  So we decide to remove all the carpets and existing tile throughout the house and put in new floors.  Then my eyes went to the walls, which used to look fine but now, I hate the paint color, OMG it has become almost a complete remodel.

I reasoned again with myself; if you don't like something change it! After all you have to live with these changes for a long time,don't settle, telling myself if you're not willing to risk the unusual then you will just be settling for the ordinary. 

So I reminded myself about the lemonade saying my Mom always quoted.  But I'd put my spin on it, so if life gives me lemons I won't settle for simply making lemonade, I will make a glorious scene at the lemonade stand. <Grin>

And so the remodeling began in October 2013, and it continued through 2014, with new tile floors, painting, baseboard installation, new fans, lighting, light switches, garage floor, brick work in the front and back yards, plantation shutters, transformation of the wardrobe closet doors, bathroom windows and mirrors. Every time I came out to see the progress on the house, I would notice something else. Such as, wouldn’t that half-moon window over the kitchen sink look neat if it matched the stain glass lamp in the dining room, and on and on it seemed to go. 

Finally I said to BFF hubby, I think we are in the home stretch, and then I would notice something else, I really hate that silly shelf thing in the wall; let’s have it filled in so we can mount the flat screen on the wall.  Then I would complain to BFF hubby and ask why is it all taking so long, and then he would tell me the contractor had to finish something at another person’s house, or was off to Arizona for two weeks!  I would freak out and say, “What do you mean the contractor will finish the floors in two weeks, he had to go to Arizona?” This was all becoming so stressful and seemed to be dragging on forever.  I found out through all of this that the quickest way to get rid of a contractor is to hire him! <Grin>

During all of this construction, I reminded myself that Patience is a virtue, and then my little voice would say or is it really the art of concealing your impatience?  Well, let me tell you, I had to really learn to practice patience and it was a tough lesson, as during all of this I found myself drifting off when hearing the reason for the delays from the contractors.  I know, I know, it takes patience to listen, but let me tell you; it takes a whole lot of skill to hold one’s temper and pretend you are listening! 

In the meantime I continued working, as due to all the construction, I had not yet decided on the date I was retiring.  I figured what the heck, the rate construction was going I had plenty of time, or was the reality that I was finding more and more reasons to not have the house ready for us, otherwise I would have to actually put in my notice and retire.

BFF Hubby called me on this, we are after all a team, and there our unity is our strength.  When we collaborate wonderful things can be achieved, that’s what I told myself. <Grin> so I said OK, left the remodeling projects to him, and committed to giving my notice in March, for June retirement.

I heard a funny saying from one of BFF Hubby’s Mother’s friends who is 90 years old; I had never heard it before so I have to share it with you.  When helping her with her computer she said, “I am so embarrassed, I feel like a penny waiting for change.”  How funny is that?

Stay with me and I thank you again for taking this retirement journey with me, or "my longest coffee break."  I'm just sayin’……..

And the beat goes on

As I stood in front of my new home I thought, What!  You own a home, shut the front door!   A home, where you collect things that you love, things authentic to you, as you let your home become your story!  There is something permanent, and very profound in being a home owner. "I wonder if it will be—can be—any more beautiful than this,” I thought, as I gazed upon my new home with enraptured eyes.  Saying to myself, “Self, this must be the loveliest spot in the world, and it’s all mine!”

Ahhh… Home, sweet home……now we get to actually enter and explore our new home, empty ,so we can  imagine where we will put “our” things. We couldn’t believe how fast things moved once we put in our bid.  The escrow closed in two weeks, and we were the proud homeowners of our “Forever Home,”   as BFF hubby and I called it.  We  are never, ever moving again!!!

BFF hubby and I were excited as we drove to our new home.  With our keys we would now open the magical front door, entering the first chapter of our new life…..but wait, what’s that you say??  What do you mean the key won’t open the lock?  Let me try it, as you must be doing it wrong!  “Stay calm,” I said, “we’ll simply call the realtor.”  We called her and advised her she must have given us the wrong keys, as the front door won’t open.  She apologized profusely, saying, “I’ll be right there. “

While we were waiting for the realtor my mind started to wander, and I began hearing all these stories fluttering around in my head, the awful things people had told me they discovered about their new homes!   I always take pride in keeping an open mind, but the trouble with an open mind is people insist on trying to put things in it. <Grin>. 

 “OK, self,” I said, “hang in there.”  Less than 20 minutes pass, yahoo, the realtor arrives.  Say what?  Her keys don’t work either!   Its OK, yeah right, let the stress level begin!  So Sandy the realtor’s keys didn’t work either, but “Don’t worry,” she said. “I’m calling the previous owner.”   Oh, this is so not good…. breathe, just breathe, I told myself.

The previous owner provided us with the password to the garage door.  Phew, just a little set back not to worry, at this point I am staying optimistic.  But here is where my mind really was and what my definition of an optimist was as I contemplated what lay behind the door; so I’m falling off the top of the empire state building (are you with me so far), and after fifty floors I say, “So far so good!”

We enter the home through the garage door, what is that smell?  I know that nothing is more memorable than a smell; one scent can be unexpected, momentary and fleeting, yet can conjure up a childhood memory of a summer beside a lake, ocean or mountains.  But this smell, argh not so much!  It smelt like a funeral parlor, a myriad of different floral scents. What is that smell???

Upon further investigation of our home we began to find numerous Air Wick scented oil containers.  She had them in all the cupboards, shelves, closets and some had the liquid spilling out of the bottle into the cabinets.  After we had gathered all of them, this woman had no less than 38 scented oil containers scattered throughout the house.   That was not all, ugh, upon inspection of the bathrooms, someone had turned off the water to the toilet, oh yes, it gets worse, they had gone number two in it and left it, what a pleasant house warming gift!

But ever optimistic we continued the exploration of our new home to see what else we might uncover, as a nagging thought crept into my mind, OMG, where did my beautiful home go?   I remember the house we bought was beautifully decorated, and everything looked perfect!  Focus on that I said, remember it appealed to you because of the area, size of the house.  But my pessimist side quickly engaged as it was evident we had been looking at it with rose covered glasses.  It looks like our glasses were pretty dirty, or perhaps it was the wine we had at lunch. <Grin> BFF Hubby said, “focus on the bones of the house, the rest is cosmetic. “

 No matter how hard I tried all I could see were the flaws in the house, which equaled dollar signs, as the carpets were horrible, every wall was painted another color, and what the heck, were those really mirrored wardrobe closets, how had I missed that?   I had a tough talk with myself, stop being negative and expecting excellence.  So I chose to ignore the pessimist in my head and listen to the optimist, telling myself nothing is perfect, everything has flaws, you just have to look past those flaws and see the opportunity to make this house the way you want it.  You will note it has now become a house again. <Grin>.

Stay with me as we continue the exploration of the house and begin the journey of home renovations, etc……I thank you again for taking this retirement journey with me, or "my longest coffee break."  I'm just sayin’

Movin on up....

Well we're movin on up, to the east side. To a deluxe apartment in the sky.
Movin on up, to the east side. We finally got a piece of the pie.  Do you remember what TV show had this theme song; it aired from 1975-1982?

I determined I could spend minutes, hours, days, weeks, even months on analyzing this retirement thing; I could keep mulling it over in my mind, trying to figure it all out perfectly.  Justifying to myself what could, would or might happen, or I could simply stop this insanity and cling to the old hippie philosophy, to go with the flow and move on!!!!  In true Hippie fashion I chose to close my eyes, clear my heart and let it go!  Groovy Man!   And here is one of my favorite hippie quotes……“The only way to make sense out of change is to plunge into it, move with it, and join the dance.”

BFF hubby’s Mom lived in Sun Lakes Country Club, in Banning, CA.  It was close to Redlands and Hemet in either direction, 50 minutes back to Corona, and even closer to Lake Elsinore, with just a tad further to OC.  That ticked off the boxes of driving distance to kids and grandkids not to mention close shopping.  Hmmm, this sounded better and better as an option.

Remember, I can say “only 50 minutes;’ I drove 1.5 hours in the AM to work and 1.5+ hours (depending on traffic) home each night.  This drive was a piece of cake to me.  Let's have a moment of silence for all those who are stuck in traffic on their way to the gym to ride stationary bicycles. <Grin>

So we began to research the Sun Lakes community on the internet.  Sun Lakes boasted real guard gates/stations.  The only way to get in was if you were on a resident’s guest list, or they had to call the resident to see if they should let you in.  This was getting us more interested by the minute.  So we called BFF’s Mom and were off for a visit to peruse the area and amenities.  

We immediately fell in love with the community!  Everyone waved at us as we drove around in the golf cart.  We used it to look for houses for sale.  Can you imagine, a neighborhood were people actually felt safe walking on the streets with their dogs, bicycling, jogging, and stopping to speak to each other?  Not to mention there were so many floor plans; condos, town homes, single story homes, two stories, all ranging from 850 square feet to a whopping 2627 square feet, with yards and patios!  The price of homes ran from $120,000 for a condo, to $385,000+ depending on the size of the home and the location. It felt like the neighborhoods we lived in during our childhood in the late 50’s.

Apparently golf course property is prime real estate, I have no idea why; in my opinion, they have no yards, privacy is out the window and you see golfers all day long in your view, not to mention the rogue golf balls.  No thanks, not for me!  And to quote Mark Twain, “Golf is a good walk spoiled.”

Drum rolls here… and now for the pièce de résistance, Sun Lakes touted a Main clubhouse with a formal restaurant, just for residents, and of course their guests.  You open up an account, are assigned a number and they bill you once a month, how cool is that?  We can jump in the golf cart, go and grab breakfast or lunch without ever having to put on our seat belts!   

We had the opportunity to taste the cuisine, and let me tell you it was on the par with some of the better restaurants we have eaten at, and reasonably priced. They serve breakfast, lunch and dinner, have a Sunday Brunch once a month, specials throughout the week, and on Fridays Surf and Turf.  Wait, that’s not all, there is also a sandwich shop, called...wait for it...the Sandwedge Grill.  It is convenient for golfers; they park their golf carts, clean their cleats and eat lunch on the patio or inside.  The patio is a great place to eat, people even bring their dogs.   

They have a huge pool at the Main clubhouse, a pool at the North clubhouse, an indoor pool, another pool inside the Condo area and a South clubhouse.  The clubhouses have an exercise room and a trainer.  They have an executive golf course, a regular golf course, and putting range.  We were hooked, and so our search for a house with the real estate agent began.

BFF and I looked at larger homes, quickly vetoed them, along with two stories, condos, and town homes. We determined since we would now be the ones cleaning the house, smaller and cozy was most definitely our preference.    The realtor kept showing us these huge homes, formal living room, great room, dens; toooo much space, after all we had already downsized! This was way too much home for the two of us and our stuff.   

BFF and I narrowed it down to 6 floor plans; we knew we wanted a three bedroom, but with a cozy feel and useful space not just for show.   What the heck are these people doing with these huge homes in their retirement years?  Well viola, we walked into a Tivoli model and we fell in love. The perfect floor plan and house; we knew we could make it a home that our heart could live in, with a door open to receive our family and friends and a garden to fill with memories and many good things!

Now it began to move fast, we found the house!  Bonus to me, it had the perfect back yard for our dog Gimli and for me to garden in.  It was less than a mile to BFF’s Mom’s as the golf cart drives.  He who has the fastest and most tricked out golf cart rules!  <Grin>

This model was the perfect size, with upgrades in the bathrooms, kitchen, and new air-conditioning, SOLD!   Offer made and accepted, now in escrow.  Phew, this all happened quickly, and it was only October 2013.  Wait!  I couldn’t retire until 2014!  

OH, OH, now the decision to retire had been made for me, there was no turning back! Onward ho! Now BFF hubby and I just had to work out the timing!  

Note to self: Today you close the door to the past, and you open the door to the future, take a deep breath, be brave and step on through to start a new chapter in your life!

Stay with me as we go through the renovations etc., oh yes, you saw that coming….  Thank you again for taking this retirement journey with me, or "my longest coffee break."  I'm just sayin’….

And the answer is…The Jeffersons